Meir Ezra
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Three Ways to Handle People

Your sister has a serious drinking problem which is ruining her life. Her husband left her and her children are being neglected. You and your other family members decide to meet with her to get her to stop drinking.

Your brother wants to use "tough love." He thinks everyone should attack her and criticize her, ". . . for her own good."

Your other sister wants to force her into a rehab program. She finds a place that will come kidnap her. She says, "Maybe if they give her some kind of an injection, she'll go quietly."

You don't feel comfortable using either approach and feel there must be a better way.

 

Three Methods

To understand the three ways to handle people, read these three definitions:

1. Enhancement: to improve or make greater

2. Domination: to control with authority or power

3. Nullification: to make something invalid

Mr. Hubbard writes:
"The methods of handling others could be assigned to three general categories. The highest category would be one of enhancement, where the individual seeks by example and good reasoning to lift the level of those around him to the point where they will partake of the projects of living with him."

"The second category would be that of punishment drive, or domination. Here the individual uses alarm, threats and the general promise of pain unless compliance is given by the others around him."

"The third category is that of nullification, wherein the individual seeks to minimize individuals." "This category would rather see a man sick than well, because sick men are less dangerous than well men, according to the 'thinking' that takes place on this band." -- L. Ron Hubbard from the book, Science of Survival

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